Scattered Thoughts

Wednesday, 1 April 2015

Normal Days #44

And So It Goes

I was quite apprehensive when I was thinking to write this post. There were many questions, doubts, speculations going on my mind whether to write what am I feeling or to write what I should feel. But then I thought if I can't be honest with myself then what's the use of this blog. I started writing it coz I can be my moronic self here, with all the self loathing and naughty self.

I don't have to pretend anything with anyone. And also I don't like human population much when it comes to sharing emotions. They are always with the rules:

Don't whine!
Don't be a sissy!
Why are you always complaining?

Here? Here I can hide and rejuvenate myself, let myself feel whatever I want to and come back again to civilized world with a smile and happy face which they always expect from you. Too much explanations, doubt clearing sessions, interrogations, I'm not the kind of guy who can stand that. I get bored very easily and hence I do the best thing I know. I run and hide.

Oh & I forgot one more thing


Too much is happening around me and my make believe world is collapsing under realities of life, the cruel truths and amidst all that destruction I want you to show some emotion for me, a real one, which is entirely for me. I'm selfish and I want all of you for me. But then when everything is going away and I've been struggling to stand on my feet I don't expect you to extend a hand. Even if you did I'm so down below I'd choose to ignore it wondering when you'll say enough is enough, man up already.

I'm getting up, to live another day, to smile, to laugh and to never let anyone know sometimes what I need is all.

Where's my poker face?

Damn you! (My favorite)

(To be Contd..)

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